so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
