Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
