You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I just forgot I was standing up.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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