R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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