So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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