somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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