I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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