She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize