You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
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He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
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For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.