It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
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I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.