My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
