im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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