theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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