I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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