he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
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