she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
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