OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
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