Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Randomize