Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Randomize