Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
