is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
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FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
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