I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
