I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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