i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
