I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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