I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize