Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
