I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
