I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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