that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize