I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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