mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I think people are normalizing furries
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Randomize
