i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
