This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Send help, water and tortillas.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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