with your own penis?
love makes seman taste better
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Randomize
