when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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