Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
