At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Randomize
