Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
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