bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
