Whod you bang
I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
The power of my boobs compel you
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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