I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
Randomize
