Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize