my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
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