I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
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