My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
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It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
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