Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
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