Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize
