so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
COCAINE IS GR8
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize