and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
