worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
i think i have herpe
just one?
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Randomize
